That's what my mother used to say about folks so cloud-headed in Kool-aidland that they didn't know how to make a decent living. You know the type - armchair philosophers with lots of religious accolades and more useless stuff in their heads that they hope to edify the yawning masses with. Get over yourself, my mother would think. Take out the trash now. Thank you.
People have all kinds of formulas for what they think makes them happy. The less creative just rely on other people's blueprints and formulas. Do x, y, z and you will succeed down a rigid path and make yourself happy. The less kind think attacking others will make them happy and sometimes view the world in simplistic zero sums, of if you are happy I won't be so I have to make you miserable. These are idol illusions to convince oneself that one is in control of their heart. This is of course dangerous stuff.
The God of Love demands we love our neighbors as ourselves and even love our enemies or persons on the attack. How easy is it to just love the people who love you back! No, you have to love the quite unlovely. People want to blame their dashed expectations on someone else as a diversion from looking at their own faults, and they then think that this will make them happy. J'accuse! they shout inanely for they like not the color of the other man's shirt and they didn't get exactly what they wanted out of the deal. Love. This is a messy business. It isn't cloud gazing. It is taking out the trash when its your turn. Its picking up the bills and the leaves off the driveway. It's picking kids up from soccer and ballet and piano and violin lessons. It's waiting at the hospital. It's being there and not running off with the first other thing that looks like it has a bigger bank account or sets you up in better style. Becoming attached does not mean avoiding any sense or reality or real responsibility for another's emotional life, as if you could make decisions in a vacuum that had any significance.
It means growing up finally.
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